Lent 4: How Deep the Father's Love

How deep the Father's love for us
How vast beyond all measure
That He should give His only Son
To make a wretch His Treasure

As I spent the past few weeks in preparation for Easter, observing Lent and challenging myself to extend more grace to my children, song lyrics began to fill my mind.  They would come unbidden in quiet moments, they were strong enough to drown out the Frozen soundtrack which has played on repeat since March.  Not the whole song, but sections of it.

How great the pain of searing loss
The Father turns his face away
As wounds which mar the chosen one
Bring many sons to glory

I am not perfect--far from it.  And this is the ultimate point of the Lenten season, to highlight just how far short I fall of the glorious standard.  I can't even go for a week without raising my voice, without snapping at a child's incessant repetition of a song (especially sung incorrectly, grr!), without grabbing a wrist or a shirt just a bit too roughly.  How different I am from the One who died.

Behold the man upon the cross
My sin upon his shoulders
Ashamed, I hear my mocking voice
Call out among the scoffers

I cannot tell you how many times I choked up during prayer, how frequently I opened my mouth and just sighed, because God, I am so unworthy.  Of your love, of this life you have given me, of the people who look at me and think they see you.

It was my sin that held Him there
Until it was accomplished
His dying breath has brought me life
I know that it is finished.

And I remember, in these moments of failure, WHY I believe as I do, WHY I live this way.  I remember that Jesus paid it all, all to HIM I owe.  Because sin had left a crimson stain (and as head laundress for a family of six, I know just how difficult the red stains are), HE washed it white as snow.  I remember how it is that I can wake up each day and start new, how each moment is another chance to get it right.

I will not boast in anything
No gifts no powers no wisdom
But I will boast in Jesus Christ
His death and resurrection

I BELIEVE IN JESUS.  When all else around me disappoints, HE remains.  Eternal, unchanging, full of love and mercy.  When confusion and despair seem to have won, I remember that victory lies at the foot of the cross.

Why should I gain from His reward?
I cannot give an answer
But this I know with all my heart
His wounds have paid my ransom.

Let's stop trying so hard to be perfect.  Let's give up this control we imagine we possess.  Let's stop comparing ourselves to each other.  Let's stop thinking we have the answer.  Let's bow our heads and thank Jesus for being the Lamb of sacrifice, and get on with the business of loving and caring for each other.

Happy Easter.