Confession: I have this tendency to over-commit. I am a woman of action and passion and there is so much in this world that needs done. Add to that my lack of a "job"...there is no schedule, no boss, no 9-5 commitment. I am the Manager of my own time, the Gatekeeper of my activities. And I don't do very well at either.
I think it stems from an over-correction, from back in the days when I was first at home with my babies, and there was all this time, but I couldn't figure out how to get out of the house, I was up to my elbows in diapers and tantrums and Elmo videos. When we did get out, to the store or the library, I'd find that the children looked fine but I had forgotten to wash the spit up out of my hair. I was still wearing yesterday's stained sweatpants while my boys were in matching ensembles from Carter's or Gymboree. I was a bit of a mess, and I did nothing quantifiable. I couldn't even read a book longer than 15 pages.
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| 2009 Keeping it pregnant |
So then, when the changes began to take place, when I finally figured out how to get out of the house and do something for somebody else, I forgot to think about myself. About what I needed, about margin in my schedule. The last few years have been about Going and Doing, and I've been so excited about it, that I've kind of worn myself out.
I decided to give myself a gift, a whole day each week for rest and unscheduled time. I had to get through the summer first, 3 months of sheer insanity, of kids filling my house and my arms and screaming in my ears. Three months of sweating at the playground and suppressing impatience while riding bikes and desperately trying to keep the screen time to a daily minimum. Each day of the summer, as I rose early and stayed up late, as I poured myself out in the care of others, I would imagine the fall and the day I was going to have at home. I began to think of it as Pajama day.
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| Busy summer 2015 |
And now, fall is here, the kids are in school, and Pajama day is a real thing. Sunday afternoons are spent with the family, making food for the week or cleaning the house, playing games or practicing piano. Then I get ready for bed, and I choose the clothes I'll be in for the next 24 hours. Flannel pants and baggy t-shirts, fuzzy socks and thick sweatshirts. Even when the days are hot, at this time of year our house stays cold. And every Monday, I keep warm in the pajamas I wear all day.
Wearing pajamas all day ensures a couple of things. I won't make plans to meet up with someone, nor will I attend any meetings or conferences. I will stay put, at home. It also makes it easier to curl up on the couch with my youngest who is home with me. We can watch movies together, or play games on the iPad, snuggled under a thick blanket. We can eat cookies at 10am, we can snack all day. We have nowhere to go. Monday has also become a great day for laundry. Because I'm home, I can switch out the loads and refill the empty drawers of my family. (I should note here that I love to do laundry. It is by far my favorite household chore.) Staying in my pajamas also makes it easier to take a nap, to lay down in bed in the middle of the day and drift off for an extra hour of sleep. This is especially fun for me, as I've taken lately to "micro naps", those 15 minute refreshers that help me get through homework and bedtime most days. But Mondays mean a relaxing afternoon to be still, to wake up slowly.
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| Pajamas and blankets and lots of cuddles |
I have given of my time so much in the past, that it felt selfish when I found myself with only one child at home. I thought I should find another kid or two to take care of so that I didn't have so much down time. And now the temptation arises to think of Pajama day as a waste, a day that can be spent on more important things. But as a mom, the weekend is no longer a time of relaxation. Saturday and Sunday are now spent on family activities, providing entertainment and breaking up arguments, buying groceries and cooking food, attending church and teaching middle schoolers. Tuesday through Friday are committed to homework and lessons, after-school activities and carpools, Bible studies and Parent-Teacher conferences. And so I hold onto Monday, to my Pajama day. It is important and it is necessary. And most of all, it is good.
