Friday, May 7, 2010

Well-rested

I haven't posted a blog in months! The reason being a good one: I started blogging late at night when I couldn't sleep, and I've been getting fully rested lately. My husband is the biggest influence over my sleep, partly because he's truly embraced the daddy role even when its his wife resisting bedtime, and also because he sometimes takes kid duty when I'm too exhausted to rock a fussy baby for one more minute. Anyway, I think its been good for me to rest up since my days are packed full of activity with the beautiful spring weather creating many more opportunities for my boys to run around outside and more opportunities for me to chase after them and make sure they don't eat dirt, play in the street, or roll in poison ivy. Also, we've been dealing for several months with the stress of helping our older son, James, increase his communication. Most of the winter was marked by huge snowstorms and appointments to test James' hearing, receptive communication, and social interactions. It was very difficult to be present for these tests, to see that there was something not completely normal about my child, to have professionals tell me that he had developmental delays, signs of autism, abnormal behaviors. This is my first-born, the carrier of all my hopes and dreams, my special, beautiful baby! And after all the tests and evaluations, I still feel confused about the "diagnosis", since there really was no one hard-and-fast answer to what was causing him to not talk. So I have nothing to focus my attention on; instead a litany of suggestions that can be contradictory and overall don't feel effective, as well as no good answer when friends and relatives ask what's wrong. The one point everyone seemed to agree upon was the treatment. So my sweet little boy has begun attending a public, "integrated" preschool where he can receive both speech and occupational therapy one-on-one, as well as interacting with a teacher and "typical peers". To clarify on integrated preschool, this is not referring to race, ethnicity or gender, but identification of disabilities, so that half the class is developing normally and the other half are experiencing delays. We've seen a definite increase in James' verbalizations, although most are still a bit garbled and can't be interpreted. He's added new words to his vocabulary as well as increasing his use of words he already mastered. But more recently I have been impressed with James' increased self-care skills, such as using utensils at meals, picking up after himself, and steps toward potty-training. Its been such a difficult year caring for a new baby in addition to the extra attention James has needed to identify and treat his delays, but I'm feeling hopeful that school and therapy are making a positive difference for my boy. I feel so blessed to be able to send him to school with a caring and knowledgeable teacher!